Checking In
We know it can be tough to start the conversation about mental health.
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At the end of the day this is still just a conversation with your friend. You are not there to fix everything and are not committing to by asking. You are there to listen, and when you do Listen, listen non-judgementally.
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Everyone reacts differently to different things, just because something isn’t a big deal to you doesn’t mean it can’t be a big deal to your friend. No one’s feelings are irrational.
Some Conversation starters to help you - remember: these are just guides for you to get inspiration from - this is still just a chat with your friend! Relax and be natural.
Hey ____ I’ve noticed that you haven’t been coming to ______ as much as you normally do, I was just wondering if everything was okay and wanting to check in on you. I’m free for coffee on Thursday if you wanted to chat about it?
Hey man I’m so sorry to hear about _____. I’m not going to pretend and tell you that I understand how you feel and what you’re going through, because I don’t and I may not ever. I just wanted to message to say that you really don’t have to go through this alone. I know you may not want to talk about things but lets hang out sometime this week and just do other stuff to try and distract yourself and let you not be alone with your thoughts. When you are ready to talk will always be here to lend an ear. Thoughts are with you, let me know if you’re free any time this week.
Alright mate how are things going. Just wanted to message to see if all was good with you because I’ve noticed that you’ve been going out a bit more and a bit harder than you usually do, not having a go because we all do it. Just wanted to pop a message in case you did have anything going on and to check that you were okay. Would hate for you to think that you only had booze to help with emotions because I know I’ve felt like that in the past and nothing good ever came from it. I know we don’t really do this emotional stuff often but wouldn’t want you to think that I wasn’t here for you if you needed, I’m so happy to listen and talk through things if you wanted. Let us know if you’re free for coffee any time this week.
Hiii don’t know about you but my soul is being destroyed by these deadlines, the stress is just awful. I haven’t done something nice in ages. Do you fancy meeting up for coffee and just having some time to chill, I know you have so many deadlines right now too and that things must be unpleasant for you as well. Even if it is just a library café meetup. Let me know!
Hiya _____ you didn’t seem quite yourself at _____ today and weren’t really enjoying things like you normally would, just wanted to message to see how you were. Not meaning to overstep but was just worried and would hate for you to think that you had to go through things alone. We can meet up early before _____ next time and have a chat through things if that’s something you’d want! X
Hey hey haven’t seen you in so long! Would be so great to catch up with you and see how things are going. To be honest I just haven’t heard from you in a while so just wanted to pop up and offer an ear in case you were going through anything because not used to having radio silence from you! I can make us dinner some time this week, there’s this new mob recipe I really want to try so let me know if you want to and if any time this week works for you!
Hey hope you not feeling too rough after last night, it was a good one though. Just wanted to message because noticed that you were a bit distracted at times last night and seemed a bit on edge. Also so unlike you to get that blackout, just wanted to message to see whether everything was okay with you (despite the hangover) and if you were feeling yourself. I know we all tend to let ourselves get a bit looser when there’s something on our minds bothering us. Let me know if you want to order a dominos and watch a film and talk through things. Free to have a chat this week most days so just let me know, just wanted to check in. All love xx